Bella's Blog

Mud, sweat and tears – 10 things I learnt at Glastonbury 2014

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It was my first time. My first Glastonbury festival, that is –and here is what I learnt from it. Please someone remind me next year.

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    1. As you pack for Glastonbury, you may think that taking pots, pans and freeze-dried noodles to last a whole army is a great idea. It isn’t. Glasto is as fantastic a food festival as it is a music festival and you won’t be wanting crumbled pasta with dodgy flavour sachets when there’s a godly mixture of mac, cheese, chipotle and jalapenos on offer. (Thank you Anna Maes!)

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      Note to self: do pack, and budget, your wallet.

    2. 20140625_092542Walking, standing, walking, standing. Believe it or not but you will choose to get up at 3.30am and spend three hours walking two kilometres at an excruciatingly slow pace whilst balancing the heaviest five bags you ever carried just to get the perfect camping spot at Glastonbury.
      Note to self: grab a massage at the Healing Fields on Day 2.
      DCIM100GOPRO
    3. Curb your selfie-taking desires. You will want to prove to the world that you are finally there but the queuing to the phone-charging tent in pouring rain is not the best way to cure a hangover. And solar chargers just don’t work in stormy weather.
      Note to self: learn to turn it off.

    4. The mind boggles at the creativity utilised when it comes to creating festival-friendly vehicles for alcohol – and children. From gin-filled hydration packs to beautifully decorated child-carrying wagons lit up by fairy lights and glitter, people take great pride in looking after what they love.
      Note to self: do better than to decant cheap vodka into old cordial bottles next year.DCIM100GOPRO
    5. The fifty shades of mud. From beige, wet mud via dark, grubby, clay-like stuff to almost white dried dust; you’ll see it all. The real trick is how to store your mud-drenched footwear over night without leaving them out in the rain.
      Note to self: Waterproof trousers are damn efficient, the hugely popular bottom-revealing shorts, or indeed the all-white trend, less so.

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      Casually rocking the waterproof trousers and bum bag look. That’s right.
    6. 20140628_235931

      FROOOMP! That earth-shaking sound that wakes you up at 3am isn’t an air raid but a giant alien spider spitting fire, co2 gas, laser beams and real-life acrobats. It’s called Arcadia and it’s as brilliant as it is terrifying.
      Note to self: bring earplugs.

       

    7. Master the art of power-napping and you will make the most out of your time at Glastonbury. There is no way you can see it all and if you want to make it to the night-time wonders of Shangri-La then you need to get those kips in throughout the day.
      Note to self: espresso at midnight is not to be frowned upon.

    8. The initial promise of showering every other day very quickly goes out of the window and you suddenly find yourself leaving the festival with towels as neatly packed as when you first arrived. Hey, they’re not called rain showers for nothing.
      Note to self: don’t kid yourself; it’s not a tan (ugh).DCIM100GOPRO
    9. Love the farm, leave no trace. It may be Glastonbury’s eco-friendly motto however 200,000+ people create rubbish. Beware of swarms of sea gulls pooping on your head as they dive in for rubbish on the final day.
      Note to self: spread the motto, use the bins. Megaphones don’t scare seagulls.

    10. There’s someone out there called Alan. And he really needs to stop hiding.
      Note to self: Stop the joke for a year and maybe it’ll be funny again next year.

Many lessons learnt there and the fact is that despite the mud, sweat and tears, you will return next year. Because frankly, Glastonbury Festival is the most fun one can have the in final week of June, especially when one goes with people as brilliant as these.

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See you next year, Glastonbury!

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